Friday, September 05, 2008

The Fortress of Solitude

Apparently, my shower is covered in some kind of impenetrable forcefield. Never mind that I can hear everything going on outside of it. No one can hear what I say from inside of it. Even if I shout.

Keep in mind that I have not taken an uninterrupted shower in over three years. It's not a shower without a little face peaking in and being asked what I am doing over and over and over. Oh, and I hear, "Are you done yet?" a lot also. Sometimes I hear weird noises in my bathroom and think Quincy is in there doing something. He normally is. He likes to unroll all the toilet paper while I shower. I never know what he's doing because my glasses are over on the counter and I am blind.

Getting back to the soundproofed shower, Quincy popped his head in today and said, "I pooped in the potty." I told him to go find Daddy. Judging by the noises I heard, he went nowhere. I heard my brush being moved around and toys being played with. I'm thinking the whole time about his naked, poopy butt that no one is wiping. Naturally, I start yelling for my husband. No answer. I heard Quincy leave the room. Then, I really yelled because yesterday he sat on the couch before telling anyone he'd pooped. I had to wash the couch cover. Did not want to strip it again. I yelled a little more. Still no response. Quincy returned and I asked if he'd found Daddy. Nope. I hurried up and got out. Went and found him myself.

He was in the kitchen washing dishes. He hadn't heard anything. Quincy never said he'd done anything. I checked both potties. Nothing. Completely clean and empty. I had been had by a 3 year old. My child lies. I already knew that though.

Still, it would be nice if someone could hear my shouts from the shower. What if I actually needed something?

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